Fifty years! My goodness!

Today is my parents' golden wedding anniversary. They were married 50 years ago, on January 30th, 1958, in Madras. For some reason, I'm at a loss for what to say. I thought I would write here about all they've done, been, seen, created .. but it seems too huge a task to write about a 50-year relationship! And yet, they've done something even bigger: they've lived it!

There have been times when I wasn't sure they would make this date, especially last year when Daddy was sick. So I'm grateful to God for giving them this incredible milestone. And grateful to them for sticking it out through all the ups and downs of life.

gLAdYs At tHe TuESday mAtiNEe

And off to the circus it was today! Front row seats to start with and lunch with a clown and two trapeze artists to finish it off. Inbetween I got to see a never-ending stream of circus acts--it started with the trapeze, then went on to balancing acts on a steel rod, tightrope, trick skaters, a "boneless" lady contortionist, daredevil motorbikers (one of whom turned out to be a woman)-- actually there were quite a few daredevil stunts, my heart was in my mouth quite often especially during the "ring of death" which was this huge double-ended pendulum like-thing that swirled high in the sky while the circus people strolled upon it most casually. One man even rode a unicycle on it!

There were tumblers who were great, and I thought they would have been even greater if they had clown make-up on--they were both brilliant and funny, well-coordinated and it was clear that they were having fun.

Next a young girl went up on this ring-swing-type-thing (yes, I haven't quite got the technical circus jargon right so you'll be seeing lots of hyphenated words in this post) and did all sorts of gasp-inspiring twirls and balancing feats up in the air, to the Titanic song! (And it was much more interesting and magical to watch than Leonardo and Kate spreading their wings on the tip of the Titanic!)

Then came a doggie troupe - 3 poms, 2 dalmatians and a poodle. They were adorable and were really happy dogs. No animal cruelty there .. their tails just never stopped wagging!!

After the doggies, it was the oddly named Dental Act. I prefer to call it "the teeth-twirlers"! All these women spinning and twirling, suspended in the air, and holding on only with their teeth! (I bet these women's husbands are careful never to go to bed angry .. OUCH).

Trick cyclists, all women, came on and did a bunch of balancing tricks, wheelies, etc. As they rode out, a bareback rider galloped in on a very beautiful horse.

(Incidentally I found out later that there's a circus superstition about the number of animals and this is why the circus has seven horses, seven elephants, etc. I only counted three camels, though. But I guess three is enough. They're pretty bad-tempered. And somewhat malodorous. I wonder if anyone collects all the wonderful elephant/camel/horse manure .. it would be such good fertiliser.)

But I digress. After the horse, an elephant trundled into the ring and performed a puja. Then a Russian woman with a lovely bum did all sorts of spinning and balancing trick with her legs in the air (lying on a platform on her back) then added hula hoops and finally juggling balls. Talk about multi-tasking!

Birds were next! Macaws and cockatoos. Heaven. They were such beautiful birds and so very sweet. (As I was putting Neembu and Maska to bed tonight I promised to tell them all about the bird act tomorrow morning).

Bicep man was next. Well, that's not what he was called but man, what muscles. His arms and shoulders were incredible. He did a whole lot of gymnastics that pretty much explained why he had these incredible muscles - red ribbon wrapped around his wrists and then up into the air to do all sorts of twists and turns entirely on his arms' strength.

There was Chinese plate-spinning by the girls and then the bad-tempered camels did a trot around and some stunts, accompanied by their equally bad-tempered trainer. Every time he whacked them on the backside I was reminded of cops whacking prisoners at a police station with their lathis. This was the only performance for which I could not clap. The dogs, the birds, the elephants even, seemed to be having fun, but the camels were just really pissed off to be there. One of them actually looked quite disdainful. (Disdainful but not miserable, fortunately. I know .. the animal-lovers get into a huff about animal performances at circuses .. but I shall not judge, my favourite man gave me this funda about throwing the first stone, and if I can apply that to child abusers, then I can apply it to circuses).

So away from social issues, and back to the show! A trampoline act, a knife act and a fire-eater (who was accompanied by a rather embarrassed-looking young woman who danced vaguely around while he posed and leapt like a matador and spat huge flames out of his mouth).

Another animal act! An elephant who played cricket. No singles, only sixes. Team India could use this, but I recall noticing some rather massive (and very pendulous) vulva and so I guess SHE wouldn't be eligible for the men's team.

Next she had a snack and a "drink" and did a tipsy thing, before taking a nap in the ring. Another elephant came in to play doctor with her. (Now, now, just because I mentioned the vulva don't go thinking perverse thoughts). He just checked her heart with a giant stethoscope and gave her an injection.

The show ended with more of the tumbling/gymnastic stuff, this time it was people jumping off one end of a see-saw and someone on the other end getting hurtled up into the air (very Loony Tunes, don't you think?!) and into a nice comfy sofa that was balanced on the end of a long rod on someone's shoulders.

And then it was over, just like that. I wish they'd had a ringleader, though--the guy with the top hat--to compere the show; I felt that would have made it nicer, given the whole thing more pizzazz. Instead there was just a voice over a microphone. Also the assistants handling the ropes etc. would have looked nicer if they were in some sort of costume.

And now you must be wondering: what about the clowns? Well, they were in and out throughout the show, and I thought I would put that in a separate post as this one is long enough as it is.

But before I go, I must tell you that I PETTED A HIPPO TODAY! One of the most dangerous animals in the world! But this one was quite benign. Still .. a hippo! After the show, William, one of the clowns, took me round the back, behind the ring and I got to meet Raja the hippo. This too, warrants a separate post. Perhaps a Haiku Noodle, even. So I'll save that for later.

I also met the dogs, a bunch of birdies, and ended my wonderful day at the circus sitting in a tent with William the clown, two trapeze artists (a married couple from Nepal) and a friend of William's who turned out to be an absolute character who regaled us with some rather bizarre ghost stories that centred around the graveyard that just happens to be behind my apartment. And that's yet another post.

But for now, good night. And those of you in Bangalore: GO TO THE CIRCUS! It's on till the 10th of February, shows are at 1, 4 and 7 pm (summer clothing recommended). And at one of these shows, Gladys and Miss Rose will be making a guest appearance. Watch this space!

List: Deccan Delights

You know me (or maybe you don't, in which case I should add a few more words to this sentence), fragmented, compartmentalised, etc. If I hadn't just decided to combine all my blogs into this one, today would have seen the birth of a new blog. But instead, having seen the error of my ways, I will simply create a new category, "Lists" where I can store all the unnecessary information I find so necessary to compile together. Here's the first, a collection of delightfully odd headlines and copy, mostly courtesy of the Deccan Herald and other local newspapers.

1. "Stop sexual abuse of young girls by close relatives and other pests."

From an article I read--forget where. For some reason, I seem to be the only person who finds this funny. I guess most people think any sentence with the words 'sexual abuse' in it must not be laughed at. Perhaps one must be either a survivor or a grammarian to appreciate the delicate hilarity here.


2. "Renuka lacked issues."

And this is why Mallika (the infamous serial killer) "asked her to visit Kaiwara narrating her about the miracles of pilgrimage. Renuka agreed for it and left with Mallika...
Sadly, it was because this young woman was unburdened by emotional problems that she turned to Mallika, the infamous serial killer (Bangalore's latest claim to fame--she is India's first female serial killer; her modus operandi - befriend desperate people at temples, promise them deliverance, then poison and rob them). Mallika, in the process of correcting this problem for Renuka, fed her cyanide and killed her. I shall never again complain about all the issues that trouble my dysfunctional mind. Clearly, issues keep you alive. If Renuka had had some, she would never have turned to Mallika. She could have been sipping tea at an Askios meeting (or coffee at an AA meeting) instead of sampling cyanide.

Okay, I need to add a post-script to that for people who don't know Hinglish. What the reporter was trying to tell us was that Renuka was having trouble conceiving, she was sterile.

Another post-script:


3. "Man With Three Wives Hangs Self"

At the risk of sounding sexist, aren't newspaper headlines NOT supposed to state the obvious?


4. "Undertrial Hits Judge With Slipper"

Too delightful. Needs no explanation.

Suniti Namjoshi

Last evening my friend Aditi invited me and about twenty other people to an evening with Suniti Namjoshi. I had no idea who Suniti was until I googled her, and now, after meeting her and hearing her read from her work and listening to her talk, I am a fan. I love that she tickled my mind open and awake. It had been sluggish and musty, yet another part of my life that needs decluttering. I needed to meet that lady!

Suniti talked about writing, and if you click on this you can read some of what she thinks about it. She also read from her work, and both asked and encouraged questions. And so we talked of emotion, of good and evil, of monsters and children and adults.

This is some of what sprouted for me, from last evening:

Children's emotions are open. They love. They hate. They fear. They want. They hope. Adults do all the same things but their emotions get contained and polluted somewhere along the line. We get quite obsessed with labels and formulae and answers and really, there ARE no answers. We clutter and pollute our insides with all this unnecessary baggage and then find ourselves incredibly complicated and think this is what being grown-up is all about. (Funnily enough, a lot of the evening was spent in asking questions and looking for labels and formalae and answers!)

Today my mind feels fertile and refreshed. Freshly ploughed. I can't wait to see what grows, and share it with you all here! Thank you, Suniti Namjoshi, for coming into my life. And thank you, Aditi, for bringing her.

If I could only bottle it ...

I finally got together the paintbrushes, paper and courage to try some watercolour painting. Not the world's greatest artist, but not the world's worst. (Actually there is no greatest OR worst. There are just artists.)

I really hate the way people hang their laundry in public view off the sides of their balconies. (I take mine up to the rooftop terrace for drying that's decent and discreet!)

But a week or so ago, I somehow saw a prettiness on my neighbour's washing line. So I sketched it out and decided to fill it in with watercolour - which I did last night. It reminded me of what I like best about drying clothes in the sun - that wonderful warm aroma they come back in with - and it noodled a haiku out of me:

Sunday morning scent

of sunshine: I go fishing,

my bait on a line.

gLadYs aT tHe ciRcUs

It was like part of a childhood dream come true. There was no sawdust in the ring, just nice red Karnataka dust--but it was a circus ring, a real live circus ring. There were acrobats doing flips on a trampoline, one girl sitting on the handlebars of a bicycle and riding backwards, there were men and women up on the trapeze.

And down in the dust, the nice red dust, Gladys and Miss Rose met the clowns of the Jumbo Russian Circus! We spent two hours with them, telling them about how we work as hospital clowns, we played together, practised together, and had a lot of fun in spite of my pitiful attempts to translate. Quite a complicated procedure all of it went through, really. From French to Franglais to English to Hinglish and finally to Hindi. But as clowns do, we all managed to communicate with each other. And even when we miscommunicated, it was okay. Clowns are cool with mistakes.

There were about eight of them. Three of them were little. They were from all over India - Nepal, Madras, Bombay .. they were Hindu, Muslim, Christian, and one of them was from phoren--"William from Belgium"--we thought he was just joking, as he said this in nothing like a Belgian accent, but it turned out he was the last of a Belgian circus family, and he'd been born and brought up here in India. His wife is Indian and none of his children are in the circus. Not surprisingly, I suppose. Circus people don't look very well off. But they smile a lot.

Some of the clowns were once trapeze artists or acrobats, who turned to clowning as they got older. They were all lovely people and enthusiastic, but very shy. They were amazed at the fact that Severine and I were clowns--"there are no lady clowns in India," we were informed.

There are now! So it looks like Gladys is India's very first home-grown "lady clown". Although to tell the truth, she ain't much of a lady. You should hear the language she uses when children aren't around.

At the end of our session, one of the clowns, Chandrashekhar, rushed off to bring us his photo albums and showed us pictures from his past. There was an amazing old black and white shot of him in white leotards (non-spangly), chest puffed out, good old seventies hair and pencil-thin moustache, from before he became a clown. And his clown pictures! Adorable! He had the most delightful costumes and the most to-die-for spiralled walking stick.

Before we left, the clowns invited us to join them in the ring at one of their shows! Not to do a full performance, but just to go around the ring once when they first come out.

THAT will be the childhood dream come true. Although in the childhood dream I was usually dressed in a spangly dress and standing on one foot atop a trotting horse, or else dressed in spangly tights and flying from a trapeze into the arms of one of the Cimarro brothers.

Ah, the Cimarro brothers .. they were the trapeze artists at Gerry Cottle's Circus, a British circus that I saw in the early seventies. I was nine. They were Italian and unshaven and they wore tights. I do not remember if the tights were spangly. I just remember falling madly in love with both brothers and wanting to run away and join the circus, if only I could remember how to get there. But I could not--remember--and so I did not--run away--and that was that. I still have a thing for Italian men.

Stay tuned for more on the circus ..

Once Upon A Spider Web

Once upon a spider web, a child placed a dead mosquito, and the two spiders who lived there became her friends. She fed them regularly, and admired them and their handiwork. Perhaps she talked to them. She didn't say.

It hurt me to hear that the housemaid, one callous day, calmly and efficiently--but not unwittingly--wiped out the web, the friends, and, no doubt, some of the little girl's faith in the ways of grown-ups.

I wonder how many of us adults thoughtlessly wipe away the cobwebs we see without stopping to look at them with a child's heart.

How often do we do "the right thing"--in the guise of religion or discipline or tradition? Or even just in the name of housekeeping? And in our smugness at a job well done, neglect to notice how cruel we can be to the children in our lives.

She must have been a lonely child, to look to spiders for companionship. And she must also have been an amazing child, to be able to, at that age, go beyond the creepy-crawly, to recognise the miracle of the web and see the art in a spider's delicate frame.

Small wonder, then, that she is now an amazing woman.