Friday 21 July 2006

Once Upon A Strip of Sticky Red Tape

Once upon a strip of sticky red tape, my blog got stuck. I knew that struggling would be pointless. My blog was a doomed housefly trapped in the web! The Nation Wide Web of bureacracy. Who was responsible for this heinous blog blockage?

"Not I!" cried Blogger Support. "I am puzzled and disappointed. I am really quite depressed."

There, there. Not to worry. This too will pass. I will seek my answers elsewhere. I will follow the sticky red road. (Oh, and look where it takes me.)

"Not I!" cried the Government of India. "I am just trying to protect the nation from terrorists."

Fair enough. (And much appreciated, as I really like being alive.)

"You-do-one-thing," said the Government of India. "You ask the Department of Telecom."

So I did. (Not really, but it's all part of the story-telling rhythm).

"Not I!" cried the Department of Telecom. "I'm pretty sure I told those Internet Service Providers to block only certain specified sites, not entire domains. I have got the instructions in triplicate on foolscap paper somewhere in a Godrej safe. You-do-one-thing. You come next week."

So I called the Internet Service Provider. (Really).

"Not I!" cried the Internet Service Provider. "I'm just being a good corporate citizen and following orders. It's not my fault. It's what they told me to do. Oh, they didn't exactly tell me to do that? It's not my fault. I have technical problems. Problems that I didn't have when it came to instantly blocking everyone's blogs. Thank you for calling. Can I help you with anything else?"

Else? I was still waiting for them to do-one-thing.

So the porridge went cold and the posts got old. Some bloggers raved and ranted and filed litigations. I did my deep breathing exercises and waited and won 67% of all the FreeCell games I played.

And now the blogs are back. Some bloggers are still raving and ranting and filing litigations. Long after they all succumb to high blood pressure, my well-expanded lungs and I will be here, hard at work, weaving tales and truths that need to be told. They may do it hyperly, but I prefer to end, as always, happily ever after.

Post-script: Following the Mumbai bomb blasts last week, the DoT instructed ISPs to block certain sites, in the interests of national security. Due to a cock-up somewhere (we may never know where) the ISPs ended up blocking entire domains, including blogspot.com. The problem's now been rectified, as you can see.

Post-post-script: a word of appreciation (several actually) to the bloggers who raved and ranted, as their raving and ranting may have accelerated the process.

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