Sunday 29 January 2006

"Behind my eyes ...

Dear me! So many of my poems mention this vast space behind my eyes. I lived in my head for so long that I created an immense world back here, and it was a good and safe place to stay.

Behind my eyes
rests so much love.
Dressed in friendship
I can only touch you with my eyes
and shall never speak my love out loud.
Which is worth more -
love or friendship?
Friendship touched with desire
is a feeling They do not condone.
So I shall keep my thoughts silent
and dream of you when I am alone.

Behind my eyes
is a love that will last.
So much more than friendship.
I can only wish that if I let up the blind
I would see my emotion mirrored in you.
Which is worth more -
honest or lies?
My words would shatter the crystal
perfect friendship we share.
So I shall keep my thoughts silent
and dream of you when I am alone.

Behind my eyes
are tears for a love that is "wrong"
A wasted emotion on infertile ground.
There will be no spring blooms, no gentle kisses.
I shall hide from you, and love from afar.
To let you look behind my eyes
would be too wonderful for me,
and too painful for you to face.
So I shall smile at you in friendship
and keep my love locked in its place.

(written on Dec 11th, 1984, 12:48 p.m.
on flight KC-NY)

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